"The time I argued against basic computer science"

I once got so defensive in a code review that I found myself arguing that execution order didn’t matter.

(In C#. A language where execution order is kind of the point.)

It wasn’t my proudest moment.
But it was a revealing one.

At the time, I’d spent months learning a mocking framework. I’d become a bit of an internal go-to for it. So when a senior engineer I really respected started asking more detailed questions—curious, probing questions—I felt pressure.

Not from him. From me.

He was trying to understand.
But I felt like the limits of my knowledge were starting to show and I panicked.
I stopped hearing curiosity and started hearing challenge.
And that’s when the conversation derailed.

What I’ve learned since is that the moments we react to most strongly are rarely about the code, they’re about what the code means to us.

This is where managers need to pay attention.

Because when that kind of tension shows up in a team, it doesn’t just affect the individuals, it affects the relationships.
And if no one steps in to help explore it, those conversations stop happening altogether.

The danger isn’t that people argue.
It’s that they stop bothering to.

Until next time,
Dermot
​The Messy Middle

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