"The Shifting Line of Support"

“You never did this before. Why now?”

That was the response a Team Lead got when they finally brought up a performance issue.

They’d managed this engineer for two years. There’d been trust, a rhythm. No need to check in too closely, they knew how to get the work done.

But something changed.
Delivery started slipping.
Obvious things were missed.
The Team Lead started paying more attention, looking at timelines, reviewing PRs, tracking progress.

Eventually, they raised it.
And were met with a wall.
​“Why are you micromanaging me?”

The problem wasn’t the conversation.
It was the contrast.

When you’ve been hands-off for a long time, a sudden shift, no matter how justified, can feel like a spotlight. Like punishment.

The engineer wasn’t just reacting to oversight.
They were reacting to the change in the relationship.
To the sense that trust had quietly eroded without them knowing.

This is the tricky thing about managing humans:
The line between support and micromanagement is always moving.

It moves with the task. With the person. With the history you share.
And with how transparent you’ve been about why your level of involvement is changing.

Here’s what I’m learning:
There’s no “right” amount of involvement.
Only the right amount for right now, for this person, in this context, and ideally, something you agree on together.

Because when you don’t say why you’re stepping closer,
people will assume the worst.

Until next time,
Dermot
​The Messy Middle

​

✉️ Enjoying The Messy Middle?​
If this sparked something useful, consider forwarding it to a colleague or friend, it might help them too.

If someone sent this email your way and you’d like to get it direct, you can sign up here.