"Breaking the loop"

A “yeah, but…” spiral can feel unstoppable once it starts.
Each response starts with "yeah, but..."
Voices rise.
Phrases repeat.
The heat builds.

But here’s the thing: you don’t have to stop the people. You just have to stop the pattern.

As a leader, a few short lines can break the rhythm:

• “Let’s pause here.”
• “I’m noticing we’re going in circles.”
• “Can we take a breath and reset?”

Simple words, said calmly, are often enough to shift the energy. You’re not siding with one person or silencing anyone, you’re just putting a wedge in the loop so it doesn’t keep spinning.

The goal isn’t to win the point. It’s to restore the possibility of listening.

Don’t wrestle the people in a heated debate. Interrupt the pattern. A short pause is often the reset everyone needs.

What line could you keep in your back pocket to gently break a spiral when you see one starting?

Until next time,
Dermot
The Messy Middle.

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