"A clear path for escalation"

Two of my team once got stuck in a disagreement.
Neither would move.
They went back and forth until, eventually, it landed on my desk.

By then, the relationship between them was strained.

Here’s the trap: as leaders, we want our teams to be self-sufficient, to sort things out themselves. But if the only options are bury the conflict or escalate when the relationship is broken, we’ve set them up to fail.

What they need is a safe, clear mechanism for early escalation.

Here’s some language I’ve started suggesting to teams when they’re stuck:

  • Step 1: Ask: “Do you see any merit to my point of view, and if so which parts?”
    – If the answer is no, then we know there’s no point continuing the loop.
  • Step 2: Close it respectfully:
    – “I believe there’s merit to what I’m saying, and I also see merit in some of your points. But I think we need to escalate this so we can reach a decision.”

It’s simple. It’s just the next step when two people can’t close the gap.

Self-sufficiency doesn’t mean solving everything alone. It means knowing when to escalate early, before relationships get damaged.

How clear is the path for your team to escalate a disagreement without shame?

Until next time,
Dermot
The Messy Middle.

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